The absence of Aunty Ice Axe from these pages has been mourned by absolutely none of our devoted readers, but she has never let complete indifference put her off. She has been working in Antarctica over the summer as Artist in Residence and while she waits for her installation-art icebergs to be towed back she is undertaking a small research project. Aunty has always felt self-conscious about her lack of qualifications and so an email offering the opportunity, in return for a very reasonable sum to be paid cash up front in used US dollar bills, to graduate from the well known University of Onehorsetown, Texas was too good to pass up. Taking her studies seriously, she is conducting her thesis on 'Muesli Bar Preferences in the Outdoors: An Experiential Ethnological Account'. To this end she would appreciate contributions from club members about their own Muesli Bar preferences and experiences:
- Would you rate yourself a Muesli Bar Monogamist ('there's just one bar for me for life'), a Muesli Bar Polygamist ('one needs a range to stop getting bored') or a Muesli Bar Opportunist ('what does it matter provided it's there')?
- What are your favoured brands and types?
- Do you tend to eat muesli bars for Breakfast? Lunch? Dinner? Every 100m vertical? Only when someone else offers you one of theirs?
- What factors are relevant in Muesli Bar choice, considering the following factors:
- Crunch: where are you on the scale of 'chewy ' a bit nutty 'soak first before eating'?
- Content: healthy-sounding fruit or the more chocolate to melt over the wrapper the better?
- Longevity: how relevant is it that a muesli bar lost in the bottom of the pack should be edible one year later?
- Robustness: Ability to withstand falls of over 25m without complete disintegration even if you don't?
- Additives: Would you go for a bright green spirulina bar or nice safe artificial flavourings?
- Wrapping: Biodegradability? Edibility? Combustability?
- What other factors influence your Muesli Bar Choice and Experience? Please give as much detail as possible.
Responses to
Thank you,
Aunty Ice Axe